Who’s Guiding your Canoe?
Have you ever been canoeing? At a Christian youth camp we help out at each summer, we go canoeing every day with the kids. They are 8 – 10 years old so most have never been in a canoe let alone know how to paddle one properly. The adult sits in the back of the canoe and the two little kids sit in the middle and front seats to “paddle”. It’s often comical to watch, not only for the kids but the adult trying to get them to paddle together. They often end up paddling in circles and stuck on logs; sometimes having to paddle backwards to get free enough to go forward again. The counselor has the difficult job of guiding the kids that are so inept, often yelling commands like “watch out for the log” or “paddle on the other side”. Sometimes at camp, the kids just simply don’t listen to the counselor. Often times those kids will end up out of the canoe and into the lake! Then it’s a long swim back to the dock…
Watching from the dock, I can’t help but notice the likenesses that can be drawn between navigating that canoe and navigating the relationship of marriage; with God as our guide, telling you where to go, and how to get there. But if you aren’t in sync with the person in the canoe with you, you’ll just end up paddling in circles.
Recently, my husband and I moved. I love our church. It’s one of the biggest reasons we moved. We needed a place for the kids to grow and a place for us to get involved with something bigger than ourselves. We needed people our own age that we could study with and build relationships. I moved for passion.
Matthew’s personality lends him to be very easily contented. He likes a routine. He thinks for himself, is constantly reminding the kids to “look at the facts” and is not easily swayed by emotion. He did not move for the relationship of a church community or to make friends. He moved to be closer to work, and to save on gas money. He moved to be closer to our kids’ friends, because the driving every weekend was too much… He moved to be practical.
Fast forward 2 months. I am loving church and I am inspired by the preaching and fellowship. I absorb all the emotion that is oozing off the stage at worship. I feel the calling for a deeper purpose for my life. I want to foster kids, and have small group in our home. One morning, I, rather foolishly begin gushing about all this to Matthew. Remember he’s practical, not emotional. So all this passion is not his cup of tea. And me, so full of emotion, loud emotion, I didn’t take his practicality very well that morning and we have a big emotional argument. My very practical, factual husband, doesn’t see a rational reason why we need to have small group if there are already plenty to choose from. And why foster children? We have 4 that we can barely keep from killing each other now! “Why do you keep looking for more purpose in your life Sarah? There is always going to be SOMEONE else you see that needs help.” It was an argument that stuck with me for a while.
See, Matthew and I got in our canoe together a long time ago, we’ve been married 16 years. We made a decision to paddle the same direction, and let God be the guide. And I truly believe that God is the one driving this canoe. But sometimes we forget that we have to paddle TOGETHER. We have to look the same direction, and co-ordinate our movements so that we can make progress. I believe that God can blend my passion with Matthew’s practical. From the beginning, Matthew and I decided to let God be the guide, he’s like that counselor that is telling us “Paddle together!” and “Forward now!” or “Look out your heading the wrong way!”
So, as I end today, I take away from my “canoe watching” a few thoughts.